by: Jasmine Morrow
This past week, my granny passed away. This entire week has been extremely difficult for me, but I am trying to find ways to remember the great things about her life and how she has impacted mine. When I was younger I was the ultimate “tom boy”. I wanted to do everything the boys did. I wanted to play football, skateboard, climb trees, play video games, everything. I can remember one time I was sitting, slouched over, legs open and my granny hollered at me. She told me that I was a young lady and ladies don’t sit and act like little boys. I remember crying to my mom and my granny told me that I would thank her later.
Well that later has come. I am still a “tom boy” at heart, but I have learned throughout my life what my granny was really trying to tell me. She was born during a time where people of color were not allowed to do much of anything. She grew up in the country of Georgia. She has seen Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. speak. She was able to grow up in a time when she was able to see real change taking place. She wanted me to understand that as a Black woman in this country we at one point were the lowest of the low. She wanted me to understand just how much oppression Black women have endured so that in my lifetime I could continue to make a change.
My granny is the reason why I am the feminist I am today. That is why the monologue about the woman who had a good experience with a man reminds me so much of her. When I was reading that monologue, Because He Liked to Look at It, I was instantly touched. This woman did not truly understand her worth as a woman. She did not see her true beauty within herself. Although I am sad it took a man to be able to open her eyes, I am happy she was finally able to see. My granny wanted me to always understand that I was beautiful and strong. She wanted me to understand to that I could do anything because I was a woman.
Matriarch's are very important particularly in communities that have experienced much social intolerance. These women had to instill strength in their descendants strong enough to last the decades of harsh treatment. Although the gendered raising you speak of might be seen as oppressive by many feminist standards it is also a way of teaching you social survival skills.
ReplyDeleteFor People of Color, and LGBTQ people, not learning such important social survival skills could have meant death.
Whenever I think of my life now or even my education process I think about my grandmother and mother as well. The strength my grandmother has I cannot even begin to understand. I am in awe of my 4 feet 10 inch brick house grandmother. I dedicated my monologue performance at the Vagina Monologues to her.
I am sure everything your grandmother wished, you have become. She lives through you, and her love shines through how you present yourself and treat others. I am glad you can look back at your memories of her and find happiness. -S. Dasher